Lost Soul
by A Nicole That Morphs
Summary: Quatre plans an assassination....and things go terribly wrong.... (PG13 for lots of blood/violence)


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Lost Soul

Duo was waiting impatiently amongst the other party-goers. He had spotted Trowa right away, but the others were no where to be seen. He walked over to the balcony, got a glass of wine, and then stepped out into the cool night air. There were a few girls out on the balcony as well, and they giggled as they looked in his direction. He flashed them a smile, and then walked over.

__

Hey, if I'm going to wait, might as well have fun doing it. He thought as he leaned against the railing.

Trowa walked around quietly, searching the crowd for Heero. There were way too many people here, he never would've expected so much.

"It's too crowded. This is going to turn dangerous." Someone whispered in his ear. He turned around to see Heero, wearing a black tuxedo just like his.

"About time you showed up. I didn't think this ceremony would attract so many people."

"Where are the others?"

"Duo's outside flirting," Trowa nodded in the direction of the balcony, "Wufei is making his way to the staircase," He looked across the room, through the crowd, and his eyes landed on the only young man not wearing a tuxedo, "Quatre hasn't shown yet."

"So everyone's in position, or close to it, except for Quatre?" Heero asked annoyed. "And this was his plan. I don't know why we trust him."

Suddenly a hushed silence filled the air, and all eyes turned suddenly to the main staircase.

The sudden silence could be heard all the way on the outside balcony. Duo looked inside to see what was going on.

"Excuse me, ladies, but it looks like the real party's just begun." He said as he moved away. He took one last look inside, and could now spot all of the other Gundam pilots in their spot. He stopped for a moment as he spotted Quatre, standing at the top of the stairs. His white tuxedo and his platinum gold hair made him look like royalty. And standing next to both Lady Une and Trieze Khushrenada, his elegance only excelled. Duo, making sure there was no one else on the balcony, pulled out a climbing rope and made his way up to the roof.

"Who would've guessed he could plan an assassination." Wufei commented to himself. He, along with some of the other guests, were lined up down the side of the stairs. He never would've thought someone like Quatre could plan a murder. And that's exactly what they wanted everyone else to think too.

"I want to thank you all for coming." Quatre announced to the crowd. "This will hopefully lead to peace among the colonies and Earth." Lady Une smiled slightly. But it didn't look like a smile that someone promoting peace should be wearing. She obviously noticed this and returned to her neutral stare.

Trieze, on the other hand, was waving to numerous people, smiling an ecstatic smile filled with joy. That was why the Gundam pilots could not assassinate him.

Duo, from his perch on the roof, diagonal from the stage where Quatre would lead Lady Une and Trieze, was amazed with how many people showed up.

"Man, this is gonna be some show." He said to himself as he turned around and pulled a small briefcase to his side. He opened it to reveal a sleek black gun. He picked it up and looked through the aim, following Lady Une across the floor and onto the stage. Suddenly he had a flash of what Quatre had told him a few days ago.

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"It's perfect!" He had said as he ran into Duo's room. "I found a way to defeat Oz!" Quatre threw a blueprint down onto the desk.

"What are you talking about?"

"Look!" He said as he unrolled the blueprint. "I'm holding a ceremony with Oz on Wednesday. That gives us three days to set up." Duo took the light on the desk and spun it so the light was shining on the papers.

"Why is it in a museum?" 

"A quiet, relaxed place where nothing could possibly go wrong…" Quatre answered. "We're going to kill Lady Une"…

"And here I am." Duo said as he brought his attention back to the present.

"Something's not right." Trowa commented as he leaned against a pillar and closed his eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"Lady Une and Trieze, without a bodyguard between them. They know there are rebels on the colonies, you think they would have some protection."

"You think they're planning something themselves?" Heero asked, contemplating the idea. "We can't back out now. If Duo doesn't take the shot, then I will." He paused for a long moment. Trowa opened his eyes and looked at him.

"Besides, if they're planning anything against anyone in this room, it's going to be Quatre." Trowa continued looking at Heero, remembering the meeting the five of them had the night before.

__

"This is crazy!" Duo yelled, frantically trying to get Quatre to change his plan.

"But it's necessary." Wufei had pointed.

"Ah, man," Duo breathed as he slumped in a chair. "I know. But one of us is going to get caught." Quatre had looked up from the window at that point.

"No. They won't 'catch' one of us." He smiled wanly.

"He's right. If they suspect anything, they'll blame it on the rebels. If one of us is caught, he must die." Heero said.

"That's not what I meant." Quatre paused, looking at each of the other pilots. "Remember the assassination of Heero Yuy in A.C. 175? Why was he killed? Because he was promoting peace, establishing communication between the colonies. Oz, or rather the Earth's Sphere Alliance, gets all the pacifists out of the way so their wars can continue." He paused again, letting everyone process what he was saying. "If they're planning anything, it's going to be the assassination of the only major pacifist in the room. Me."

Duo had stood up at this point, almost tipping the chair over.

"What? Are you serious? You can't be thinking this! This is your death wish!"

Quatre had looked away, not wanting to look into Duo's pleading eyes…

"This is going to go wrong." Trowa said. Heero looked at him.

"This is the way it has to be."

Wufei moved his position on the stairs so he could see the entire length of the stage. The absence of bodyguards only upped his suspicions of Oz. Quatre ran a hand through his hair, the signal to put their plan into action.

"Let's get this over with." Wufei stated. He made his way to the top of the stairs and arrived there just as Quatre, Lady Une, and Trieze stepped into position on the stage.

"Let us begin the talks of peace, just as my father would've wanted it." Trieze walked over to Quatre and placed a hand on his shoulder to comfort him. Automatically the paparazzi began shooting pictures.

"Now, on to more pressing matters." Trieze said as he took center stage. "As you know, Oz has been working towards peace in the universe ever since the decline of the Earth's Sphere Alliance…"

"Who would've guess a single person could make up so much crap." Duo commented as he listened to Trieze's speech. He noticed a movement behind the stage curtain, and saw a glimmer of a smile cross Lady Une's face. He reached for his rifle, knowing his moment was drawing near.

"…Oz wants nothing but peace between the colonies and Earth. Hopefully peace will be the theme of the new era. And, with young men like Quatre, who realize the importance of peace, I'm sure our goal will be met with soon." Trieze ended his speech, and a wave of applause followed him to his seat on the stage.

Quatre, who was sitting to Trieze's right, sneezed, and waited for the mayhem to begin.

"That was the signal, Lady Une's taking center stage." Trowa said as he watched the events, adrenaline coursing through his veins. 

"What is Duo waiting for?" Heero asked impatiently. "We have no room for failure!"

And Heero was right. There was no room for mistake. But Duo saw their mistake right after Trieze had stepped down from the podium.

"No! Damn it! Noo!!" He yelled, although no one could hear him. He began to make his way down from the roof, when he noticed Wufei was looking at him.

He had seen their mistake. His position had allowed him to. Wufei made his way down the stairs.

"He knew it! Quatre knew it, he realized it, so why didn't we?" Wufei whispered to himself as he ran down the stairs.

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"We can't have any communication between the positions," Quatre said as he laid out his plan to the rest of them. "That would make it more likely for all of us to get caught. All we have to do is keep an eye on one another, and see if they try to signal. That's the safest way."…

Heero, who was getting increasingly annoyed, looked around the crowd. He noticed Wufei making his way down the stairs and immediately his eyes shot up to the dome. There he saw Duo motioning frantically and obviously yelling.

"The plan just changed." Heero stated.

Quatre had sensed the sudden change in the mood of the other Gundam pilots. Panic. That was the main condition.

__

What's taking Lady Une so long to start? He thought to himself. And then, suddenly, it all fell into place.Quatre got up slowly and looked around.

"GET OUT OF THERE, DAMN IT QUATRE!" Duo yelled. He watched as Wufei ran towards the stage. Quatre stood up.

"MOVE FASTER!" Duo yelled again. From behind the stage curtain a gun much like the one Duo held appeared.

Heero saw Lady Une reach behind her back and pull a handgun out of her belt, and slip it under the podium. Then she began to speak.

"Like Trieze has already stated, peace is the only way we will make it through the new era. But first, we must get the people who are living in the past to see the glory waiting in the future…"

Heero looked back at Duo, who was still going crazy with his signals.

__

So she's going to kill Quatre. Lady Une herself. Heero thought.

"I'm taking the shot." Heero added aloud as Trowa made his way to the stage.

"Go ahead, Heero. Go right ahead."

Heero pulled the handgun out of his pocket.

"Oh my God! He has a gun!" A woman next to him yelled. Without time to aim, he pulled the trigger just as a man nearby tackled him to the ground.

"Nnnnnooooooooo!! You fool! God-damn you, Heero!!!" Duo yelled. He knew Lady Une's plan would work as soon as he saw Heero pull out his gun.

Quatre dodged the bullet as the shot meant for Lady Une sailed past him.

"That was close…" He said as he dove out of the way, landing in a squatting position on the ground. He looked at the crowd, which was running towards the door. Then, just as he saw Trieze and Lady Une run off the stage, he heard another shot.

As he tried to locate where it was from, he realized a moment too late the shot came from behind him. He felt the pain before he saw the blood seep through his white tuxedo, and then he collapsed motionless to the stage.

Duo, who wasn't about to watch Quatre get killed, kicked in the window and came in through the ceiling. As he touched ground, he heard the shot Heero took, and everything suddenly seemed to move in slow motion. He looked up in time to see Quatre collapse to the stage floor in a cry of pain, in time to see Lady Une smile triumphantly, in time to see the crowd that was left exit.

"Someone shot Quatre!" A civilian yelled.

"No shit!" Duo yelled back as he ran towards the stage. Both Wufei and Trowa arrived before he did. "QUATRE?!" Duo yelled as he jumped onto the stage, almost slipping in a puddle of dark blood on the stage. He could hear the ambulance in the distance.

"He's breathing." Trowa commented coolly. "But the shot is probably fatal."

"And you're just gonna take it as that?" Duo shot back roughly. 

"Quatre knew what he was doing. He expected this." Wufei said.

"He was also expecting one of us to save him! But we failed, damnit. He told us every possible scenario, but none of us made a move to protect him"

"Quatre was also expecting Oz to kill him. Not one of us." Heero said as he made his way to the stage.

Duo knelt next to Quatre and turned his body over so he was face up.

"Quatre? Please, you'll be alright, I swear." Duo pleaded. But the most response he got was Quatre coughing up blood.

Just as they were all about to go over the situation, the doors burst open and the ambulance workers made their way across the floor with a stretcher.

******

They decided to meet up at the hospital. That way they each had time to remember what they had seen. 

But Duo already knew exactly what had happened. Although Heero hadn't shot Quatre, he was as much to blame as the person who did because it had been his shot that was the signal to the rival sniper. As he walked down the streets, he often stopped in front of TV bulletins to see if the attempted assassination was being reported, and it was. Heero was being targeted as the 'unknown murderer' because as far as everyone else knew, Quatre was already dead.

"But he isn't…he just can't be." Duo kept saying to himself. They never should've let him go through with this plan. So why had they? Duo supposed it was because whenever Quatre had a plan, it usually was a good one that always worked. But this time it had gone very, very wrong. Duo turned his head away from all the TV reports, and pictured the Quatre he used to know, before his father died. If Oz could try to kill someone as nice and considerate as Quatre, who couldn't they try to kill? Duo closed his eyes for a moment, and was surprised to feel tears rolling down his cheeks. He pulled his hat down farther and put the collar of his jacket up as a few cop cars drove by.

He wiped the tears away quickly, turned his head up to the night sky, and muttered to no one,

"I'll get Oz for this. No matter what it takes."

Heero, who was walking down a street a few blocks away from where Duo was, was not sharing in Duo's thoughts of revenge. He was sure he had done the right thing…when he did it. But now he was having second thoughts. He had done exactly what Quatre had told him to do.

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"Heero, I need to speak with you." Quatre had said as he pulled Heero aside before the party.

"Change your mind about the plan?"

"No, why? Did you?" Heero shook his head. "Anyway. I need to ask you a favor. If Duo seems as though he isn't going to take the shot," Quatre paused as he fixed his bow tie, "I want you to. I know Duo's worried something will happen to me, but I know you see this my way. Don't worry about me. If Duo doesn't take the shot on Lady Une, I want you to."

"What if he sees something I can't. A threat to you, perhaps?" Heero wasn't backing out, he just wanted to make sure Quatre knew what he was getting into. This unrational behavior was so unlike Quatre.

"I told you, don't worry about me, that's not your mission. Your mission is to destroy Oz. Which means killing Lady Une. I'll be alright. If I suspect anything, I'll get out of there." His gaze met Heero's and there was no fear. "I can take care of myself." He said, and Heero could do nothing but agree…

"Or could I have done something? Stopped him; told him no? But he was right. Deep inside we all know he was right. Our mission is to destroy Oz, not protect eachother." Heero said out loud. Then, another thought struck him.

"What if Quatre wanted to die? What if he didn't know, but was hoping they would kill him? He was so upset about his father that it wouldn't be surprising. That would mean he only made the plan so we could all witness his death…" Heero kept thinking about this, but didn't have time to work out the details because as he looked up, his eyes met with a spotlight shining from a cop car. Heero's hand automatically flew to his pocket, where he had replaced his gun after he took the shot at the museum.

"Put your hands in the air, and don't move." An Oz soldier yelled from behind the spotlight. In one lightning quick movement Heero pulled out his gun, and fired at the spotlight. The bulb shattered, leaving them in almost complete darkness.

Heero turned around to run, and was met with a gun leveled right between his eyes.

"I don't think you want to move." The lieutenant holding the gun said. "Because I will blow your brains out." Heero turned his head around slowly, surveying the scene. He was surrounded on all sides, there was no escape. Oz wanted him bad, they weren't going to let him escape.

"Lady Une, we've caught the murderer." An official said as she stepped out of a nearby cop car. 

"Good. Bring him to the base." She took her gun out of it's holster, pointed it at Heero's leg, and fired.

"AGH!" Heero fell to the ground, clutching his leg. The bullet had hit him in his left shin, and was lodged. It didn't hit the bone, and it wasn't a serious injury, it was just enough to keep him from escaping.

"What are you waiting for?! Handcuff him and bring him back to base!" Lady Une commanded. And before Heero could piece together exactly what had happened, he was hauled into the back of an armored van.

******

Duo walked down the sterile hallways of the hospital, making his way to the front desk. As he walked into the waiting room, he glanced at the TV.

'…And following the murder of Quatre Raberba Winner, his assassin has been apprehended…'

"He isn't DEAD!" Duo yelled as he picked up the remote and threw it at the T.V. The hospital workers looked at him warily. "Tell me what room Quatre's in." He requested to the lady at the desk. She looked puzzled.

"I'm sorry, you must have the wrong hospital." She replied politely. 

"No, I don't. There weren't any ambulances dispatched in the past hour?"

"No, I'm sorry sir." Duo glanced around, looking for Trowa or Wufei. Not seeing either of them, he turned back to the woman.

"You're sure? You see, I'm his best friend, so you don't need to pretend or—"

"He isn't here." She replied annoyed. Duo looked up at her, smiled a wicked smile, and pulled his rifle from it's place on his back.

"I don't know what the hell you people are up to, but I'm going to find out!" He said unsteadily, as tears began rolling down his cheeks again. "Oz tried to murder Quatre!, not him." Duo said as he pointed his gun at a picture of Heero on the TV, then fired, shattering the TV. "But we're all to blame! If you don't tell me where Quatre is right now, I'm going to kill you."

"Who exactly are you?" A man behind him asked, and before Duo could turn around, the man pulled off Duo's hat, and his braid fell back to it's rightful spot. "Oh my God! It's a Gundam Pilot!" The man yelled.

Wufei and Trowa, who had met each other outside the hospital, made their way to the front desk as soon as they heard a shot fired. Wufei ran into the waiting room just as Duo shot a second bullet at the man who pulled off his hat.

"Duo, stop it!" He yelled. Duo looked at him, his cheeks soaked with tears he had shed and was still shedding.

"They don't have him, Wufei. Quatre isn't here." Trowa ran up and put handcuffs on Duo.

"Don't worry, I work for Oz. We'll have this rebel taken care of." Trowa said as he disarmed Duo and led him outside. They had only made it a few blocks before the cops showed up at the hospital. But Duo was gone by then. Trowa, making sure no one was around, released Duo from the handcuffs. He was trying to stop the tears, but it was obvious he wasn't able.

"They don't have him, damnit! That ambulance worker lied to us!"

"That's no excuse for shooting a civilian!" Trowa shot back.

"How did it all go so wrong?" Wufei asked quietly. Trowa turned his head away and began walking again, this time away from the hospital.

"I don't know." He replied simply.

But the truth was, he did know what had gone wrong. And he was probably the only one who truly understood the severity of the situation. Duo noticed Trowa's distracted gaze and looked at Wufei for an answer, but Wufei looked as confused as him.

"Something on your mind, Trowa?" Duo asked.

"No, I'm just trying to piece everything together." Trowa lied. Had he been right in telling Lady Une about the conspiracy against her? It had probably cost Quatre, and maybe Heero, their lives. Was his disguise worth two lives?

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"Colonel Une, I would like to speak with you." Trowa requested the day he found out about Quatre's plan.

"Yes, Trowa, what is it?"

"Can we speak in private?" Lady Une saw the look of concern on Trowa's face, and she looked around.

"There's no one else in the room, officer. State your business." He sighed and sat down, knowing he wasn't going to get her to move.

"I've been informed that a group of rebels are going to be at the peace convention on Wednesday."

"That can be expected, Officer. If you have nothing important to tell me, I'm going to have to ask you to leave," Then, in a softer tone she added, "His excellency Trieze is arriving in two hours, we have to make preparations."

"The rebels are plotting a murder." Lady Une looked at Trowa for the first time since he had started talking. "I don't know if it's you or Trieze, but maybe you shouldn't go to the convention." Lady Une smiled slyly, and Trowa realized his mistake.

"But you know it isn't Quatre Raberba Winner, that the rebels wouldn't try to kill him after killing his father." Trowa tried to hide his wince. He knew very well that wasn't true. Rebels hadn't killed Quatre's father; technically Oz had.

"That's why I figured they would sympathize with him, ma'am." She turned her back and looked out a window.

"Then we have to be sure it isn't Quatre who is planning the attack. You know Quatre, don't you?"

"Ma'am?"

"I want you to work undercover. Find out what you can and report back to me. Oz will take more…secretive methods."

"Like what?"

"That is not your concern! Now, I want you to go and find out everything you can about this plan."

"Yes, ma'am." He saluted and walked out. "What have I done?" He whispered to himself as he walked down the hall.

And at that moment, walking under the night sky, the various events that Trowa knew about fell into place, and he realize exactly what happened, and how he was the one to blame.

"I'm going to find the person who stole that ambulance and—"

"—You haven't figured it out yet, Duo?" Trowa said as he looked at Duo, who had calmed since his little incident at the hospital.

"What do you mean?" Wufei asked.

"No one called the ambulance. It was probably waiting a few blocks away, for a transmission from Lady Une. Now Oz has Quatre and Heero. They set up the whole counterplan based on our attack! Our plan was the base for theirs. How could you not figure it out?" Trowa yelled. Duo glared.

"Maybe we couldn't figure it out because we weren't in with both sides!"

"I wasn't! It was the logical connection." Trowa bluffed.

"Then how did they know about the plan?" Duo shot.

"That's easy. They bugged his mansion." Wufei said. "They probably guess rebels were planning against someone in the room, some official. They either suspected Quatre or were planning to protect him. Which means Trowa would not be caught either way." Wufei finished. Duo considered this while Trowa looked slightly relieved.

"Well, let's go check Wufei's theory. If they bugged the mansion, the bugs'll still be there." Duo said in a neutral voice, showing he didn't fully agree with Wufei, but wasn't going to argue because it was the only lead they truly had.

******

"How is he?" Lady Une asked a doctor who had just exited from Quatre's hospital room, located in the Oz base.

"The operation was successful. But he's still in critical condition. It's been almost two days and he hasn't awakened. He's probably slipped into a coma." Lady Une crossed her arms over her chest.

"I suppose we'll just have to wait then. How's the other boy?"

"Oh, he's fine. Just like you suspected, he's gotten over his injury faster then anyone I've ever seen."

"So we've put him in S.C., right?" 

"Yes, ma'am." The doctor ended as he walked off. Lady Une then entered Quatre's hospital room, making sure to close the door behind her.

Seeing the young Quatre lying motionless in the hospital bed, almost as pale as the white sheets that surrounded him, made her feel a pang of guilt and sorrow.

"It was either me or him." She reassured herself aloud. The heart monitor was making the silence in the room less awkward. She smiled down on Quatre's body. "As soon as you wake up I'll find out what I need from you," she paused. "And then I'll present you to a different level of hell." She exited the hospital and headed towards Heero's cell.

As she arrived, she was met by various lieutenants, but Lieutenant Talcon was the only one who spoke.

"Colonel Une, are you sure you want to go in there? That Gundam pilot seems unstable to me."

"Lieutenant Talcon, I did not ask your opinion on the matter! Open 01's cell now." Talcon stepped aside, unlocked the cell door, and opened it.

Lady Une stepped into the dark cell and looked around, letting her eyes adjust. As she began to focus, she saw the young boy sitting with his back against the wall. He appeared to be sleeping. Lady Une walked over and nudged him with her shoe.

"There's no need for that, Colonel." Heero said without opening his eyes.

"Get up."

"Why?"

"Because I told you to. You should not need any more reason then that. Get up. Now." She growled. Heero obediently rose to his feet and followed her out of the cell. "You will do exactly as I tell you, or you will be killed."

"But you're going to end up killing me anyway." Heero stated in his monotone voice.

"You have to decide if you'd rather live a few more days or not." Lady Une replied as she led him down to the hospital wing.

As she approached Quatre's hospital room, she held up her hand.

"Wait here." She opened the door and checked on Quatre, making sure everything was still in order. When she entered the room she felt that pang of guilt creeping up her spine again.

She closed the door behind her as she exited.

"Let's go."

"That's Quatre's room, isn't it?" Heero said as he walked past the door.

"What does it matter, you'll never see him." Lady Une replied rudely as she turned a corner and opened a door marked 'Interrogation Room.' She shoved Heero in ahead of herself and then sat him in a chair.

"What do you know about Quatre Raberba Winner?" Heero looked at Lady Une.

"I know that he was assassinated." Lady Une glared and pulled the gun at her hip out of the holster.

"Don't be smart. Is he a Gundam Pilot or not?" Heero looked into the barrel of the gun.

"Does it matter now?"

"I'll kill you if you don't tell me."

"It makes no difference to me." Heero stated evenly. Lady Une stared at him. "I'm prepared to die."

"Even for a lost cause?" Heero nodded. Lady Une placed her gun back in the holster. "Where's your Gundam?"

"On Earth." Lady Une sneered.

"A Gundam pilot without a Gundam. Isn't that like a soldier without a reason to fight?" Heero looked at Lady Une.

"What are you getting at?"

"Without one the other has no purpose. A soldier without a reason to fight will start meaningless battles to keep that reason alive. A Gundam pilot without a Gundam will fight for a reason to need his Gundam." Heero stayed quiet for a long time. He hadn't been expecting Lady Une to take that approach. But he saw what she was getting at.

"The Gundams will always have a reason to exist, whether to fight Oz, or some other corrupt foundation. The Gundams will always be there. You will never be able to get rid of us completely."

"You like to think that, don't you?" Lady Une asked rhetorically. "Would you like to see Quatre?" She asked. Heero shrugged.

"I thought you said you wouldn't let me."

"Well, I figured you might as well see him once more before you both die." She replied nonchalantly. "It seems fair enough."

"You're going to kill him after you went through all the trouble to save him?"

"If he's anything like you, it shouldn't be that hard to believe." Lady Une opened the door and spoke with the lieutenant outside. "Take him to the Winner hospital room."

"Where are you going, Colonel?"

"I need to speak with His Excellency Trieze." She turned and walked down the hallway, towards the communications room. Lieutenant Talcon entered the Interrogation Room.

"Get up. You're going to visit your pal, the Winner kid." Heero got up without a word and made his way to the door. He couldn't decide what to do about the situation. Would Quatre tell Lady Une anything? But if Heero tried to kill him, what would it accomplish? It didn't matter if either of them told Lady Une anything, because either way, they were both going to die.

******

Duo walked into Quatre's dining room and dumped over fifty microchips on the table. Wufei looked up from the newspaper.

"I found all of these upstairs in my room, Quatre's room, your room, and Heero's room." Duo remarked. "For some reason there wasn't a single one in Trowa's room." Duo added moodily. Wufei dumped some more out of a bag and onto the table.

"Trowa and I found these in various rooms downstairs. Whatever they wanted to know about Quatre, I'm sure they found it out."

"Damnit! They must know Quatre's a Gundam pilot!" 

"Did we ever say that?" 

"I..don't remember. But that doesn't matter now, does it?" Duo got a sort of wistful look on his face. "He's probably dead."

"Is that how you feel? Then maybe you should just quit here. No use in you continuing to uncover Oz's plan if you don't believe there's a reason." Wufei said simply. Duo looked up at him.

"I need to be sure. And if he is dead, I have to figure out where I went wrong." There was a long moment of silence between them. It was so strange being in Quatre's house without Quatre. They had been there for two days, and everyplace Duo looked, he saw something that reminded him how urgent it was that they find Quatre before Oz figured out what to do with him. "Where's Trowa?" Duo broke the silence.

"He went to Oz headquarters to see what he could find out."

"It took him two days to think of that?"

"No. He had to wait for things to calm down. They might've gotten suspicious if he went in the day after the incident and began nosing around."

"Or maybe this is part of some bigger plan he has." Duo said mysteriously. But when Wufei shot him a 'get real' look, Duo quickly changed the subject. "I'm gonna make some coffee. You want any?" Wufei let out a short laugh and Duo walked into the kitchen.

******

__

"Quatre, please, you can't go through with this! Oz is planning something against you!" Trowa had pleaded the day of the peace convention.

"I'm willing to take that chance. If they're caught, it's the end of them. And if they aren't then that's the way it has to be."

"What's wrong, Quatre? Please, this isn't like you. What aren't you telling us?" Trowa asked, although he already knew that it was the death of Quatre's fathers death that was making him think so irrationally. He had to prevent Quatre from taking the stage that night.

"Nothing's wrong, Trowa. You just need to trust me. As long as everyone does what I ask, the plan can't fail." But it was clear to Trowa that Quatre wasn't telling him something. He wouldn't make eye contact with anyone, and if you managed to catch a look into his eyes, you could see pain, sorrow, and suffering beyond known boundaries.

"Quatre…"  
"Trowa, please, just leave. I've already made up my mind and nothing you say will stop me." Quatre rushed Trowa to the door. "I'm sorry." He finished as he closed the door…

"Oh, Quatre, why didn't you just listen to me?" Trowa said outloud as he looked at Quatre lying in the hospital bed. He was standing about two feet away from the foot of the bed, wearing his Oz uniform. "I'll make sure you get out of here alive, my dear friend." Suddenly Trowa heard a noise outside the door. He looked around quickly and placed himself in a chair across from Quatre's bed so it looked as though he was on guard duty.

"Get in there." Lieutenant Talcon said as he pushed Heero through the door to Quatre's hospital room. Without checking to see if anyone else was in there, he slammed the door behind Heero.

"It's good to see at least one of you is alive and well." Trowa said. Heero spun around, and his eyes fell on Trowa.

"Trowa! What are you doing here?"

"Seeing how badly we screwed up."

"It's not as bad as it seems."

"No," Trowa looked up and met Heero's eyes, "It's worse." Heero sat down in a chair next to Trowa's.

"How is he?" Heero asked, motioning towards Quatre.

"Critical, but I think he's stabilizing." 

"We have to get him out of here. You have to get Quatre out of here. I can get out myself."

"No, you can't. Oz won't let you. As for Quatre, it's best not to move him until he's healed." Trowa looked out the window. "I messed up big this time."

"It wasn't just you, Trowa. You can't take all the blame." Trowa smiled 

"I wish it were that simple. But, I'm the one who told Lady Une about a plot against her. I made a big mistake that pointed the conspiracy towards Quatre. And if it's the last thing I do, I'm going to fix my mistake."

******

__

"Quatre. You've been very disobedient…nothing good could come from involving yourself in a war…" Those were the first things his father had said to him when he arrived back home. No asking if he was alright, no telling him he loved him.

"But someone has to fight, otherwise this war will never come to an end!" Quatre had replied. It sounded lame and rude now that he thought about it.

"Well, has it ended? Did you battle end the war? What could you accomplish! What could a child like you accomplish?!" His father had yelled back. The words stung Quatre. He hated being considered a helpless kid. And hearing it from his father made him wonder if he really was doing the right thing. Would anything come from him being in the war? Being around Eraya made him feel a little better, but he was still questioning himself.

"I heard from father that my little brother had become a Gundam pilot…we're all rooting for you, Quatre." She had always been so nice to him. The warmth he felt around her was always something that helped him clear his mind. But now that was gone forever.

"Another Gundam pilot who fought like you was caught and his Gundam was destroyed in from of everyone to set an example…there just aren't any people left in space who think of the Gundams as their allies. Quatre, are you sure you can still fight?" Even Eraya had tried to warn him. But he didn't listen. Why, why didn't he? If he had, at least they wouldn't have died in vain.

"…one day they'll come to see the truth. I truly believe that's going to happen." And he did believe that then. But now he was sure hat the colonies were working against everyone that once fought for them.

"…Just try to remember how much we all love you. I really wish you wouldn't be so sad, my dearest little Quatre…" She had ended up agreeing with him. It made him happy to know at least one person in his family besides himself saw what he was fighting for.

He watched as his dream faded, and he was left in the darkness of his mind, mentally feeling the emptiness that now made up his life.

******

"How is he?" Duo asked Trowa excitedly. "He's alright, right?"

"I didn't ask." Trowa replied. He didn't want to tell Duo anything that might get him angry or too excited.

"How could you go and not visit him?" Duo scoffed. But he shrugged it off. "Doesn't matter anyway. I got a plan of my own." He added as he walked out of the room. Trowa took a seat at the table next to Wufei.

"Did you see Heero?"

"Yeah. He was in Quatre's room when I visited."

"Have either of them told Oz anything?"

"Heero hasn't. Quatre can't, he's in a coma." Wufei paused a moment, registering the situation in his mind.

"We should attack Oz. Duo wants to kill Lady Une." Wufei said. Trowa remained silent for a few minutes.

"We will. But let me go back to headquarters a few more times so I can see what we're up against." Trowa got up and moved away from the table. This time he wasn't going to tell Lady Une.

This time he was going to be a true Gundam pilot.

Duo went up to his room in Quatre's mansion. He needed some time alone, and he knew that Trowa wasn't going to tell him anything.

"Why won't he tell me? I'm Quatre's friend! I mean, am I the only one who realizes that everything falls apart when he isn't here?" It didn't matter if Trowa told him how Quatre was, because Lady Une was going to pay whether he was alive or not. Duo smiled wickedly as he looked out the window.

"I suppose it's time for the God of Death to take some revenge. Quatre, I promise I'll kill Lady Une…for you."

******

Trowa was again sitting by himself in Quatre's hospital room. He would've gone to talk with Colonel Une, but he didn't think he would be able to lie to her now. He felt so guilty, and he was so determined to make everything normal again that he didn't think he would be able to look Lady Une in the face without accidentally telling her something.

Unfortunately, the next person who entered the room wasn't Heero, but Lady Une. Trowa was on his feet and standing at attention as soon as he saw her enter the room.

"Ah, Officer Trowa. At ease." She smirked. "You are just the person I wanted to speak with. But first, what are you doing in here?"

"I feel responsible, ma'am. Why didn't you tell me you were going to kill him?"

"Because you would've tried to stop it. I know how close you are with Quatre. You tried to stop him from trying to kill me, and Trieze decided we wouldn't do anything to Quatre unless he did something to us." Trowa was in shock. If only Heero hadn't pulled the trigger…._they set it up so they would get to kill Quatre whether our plan worked or not._ "But at the last minute Trieze requested we keep the boy alive for a while. So we set up the ambulance." She turned away from Trowa and looked at Quatre. "We were not originally going to save him."

Trowa was at a loss for words. He was worried that if he opened his mouth he would say something that would blow his cover totally. But he couldn't just stand by silently.

"So to make your plan work you made sure to impose the idea that you were going to kill him." Lady Une looked alarmed.

"I should've expected you to figure it out, Trowa. Trieze doesn't even know about that part of the plan. So let's keep it as our secret." She turned, opened the door, and walked out. All that was left for Trowa to do now was to contact Trieze. But he didn't feel he should leave Quatre just yet. If Lady Une would do something like pull a gun to move an enemy's plan without Trieze's knowledge, there was no telling what else she'd do.

Heero was quite shocked that Trowa had told Lady Une about their plan. He had always thought that Trowa thought of Quatre like a brother. Was it possible that Trowa knew something about Oz he wasn't telling the rest of them? Or maybe he saw another way to defeat Oz. The only way Heero would be able to find out was when he spoke with Trowa next.

"That could be any time between tomorrow and two weeks." Heero said to himself. He looked around the dark room that made up his cell.

******

"Wufei, hand me those bullets, please." Duo said as he packed a backpack full of various items. Wufei picked up the bag of bullets and put them in Duo's open hand.

"Don't you think you should tell Trowa about your plan so he can help?" Duo slid on his black hat and looked up at Wufei.

"Help mess up my plan, you mean? We tried to kill Lady Une once and Trowa screwed it up. I'm going to make sure he doesn't do it again."

"Then let me go with you."

"If that's what you really want. Besides, Trowa'll probably be at Oz when we attack anyway. He's a smart guy, he'll figure out what's going on." If Duo managed to figure out what Trowa had done to mess up their first plan, he wasn't worried that Trowa wouldn't pick up on their new plan. But Duo wasn't angry with Trowa because he had at least tried to fix his mistake. Duo found himself still blaming Heero for the entire incident. "Wufei, can I ask you something?"

"Hm?"

"Who do you think is to blame for this? Was it us, or Oz, or Quatre?" Wufei paused, thinking his response over.

"No one group or person is to blame. It happened because of a bunch of little mistakes on both sides. When one of our own gets injured, especially someone like Quatre, we always need to place blame. So if we have to, I'd say both Oz and us are to blame. For once we're both the bad guys." Duo zippered up the backpack and went for the door. Before he opened it, he turned back to Wufei.

"I know you're right, Wufei. But if I know it, how come I find myself blaming Heero instead of all of us? I can't seem to think straight without Quatre here. He helped me stay focused on the mission because he was so kind, and I knew that if we failed, all those people who are like Quatre would be gone in an instant." Duo leaned against the door. "And now that we failed, Quatre may be dead. Do kind people deserve to be targeted and killed when we mess up?"

"Duo, Quatre is one of us. He's not as innocent as you'd think."

"But was he really one of us, Wufei? He was always different. Where one of us would've killed an enemy, he let them go."

"Then maybe it is his fault this happened." Duo smirked and opened the door again.

"It doesn't matter either way. I'm still going to kill Lady Une. You coming?" Duo made his way to the front door, followed a few minutes later by Wufei.

******

Trowa woke up, startled. How long he'd been sleeping, he didn't know. As he sat in the silence of the hospital room, he realized what woke him up. Quatre was murmuring something. He was obviously still in a semi-coma, because he was whispering incoherently. But this meant he was bound to wake up soon.

"C'mon, Quare. You can't give up now." Trowa whispered as he got up and sat on the side of Quatre's bed. He had to get Quatre out of there as soon as possible. Lady Une was bound to kill him, probably with orders from Trieze himself. Trowa leaned over and pushed some of Quatre's hair off his sweating forehead. He paused for a moment, his hand still resting on Quatre's forehead.

__

"I'll be fine, Trowa. Don't worry." Trowa heard Quatre's voice. He pulled his hand away quickly and looked down at Quatre, but he was silent. Had he said it, or had Trowa imagined it as a way to ease his guilty conscience?

****** 

The pain was becoming more real by the minute, which was both good and bad. It meant he was still alive, that the darkness he had been in wasn't hell, but it also meant that when he woke up, he would have to face the other pilots. That was something he didn't think he could do. He felt horrible for putting them through this, but a part of him didn't regret it at all. They didn't know the pain he had been put through, how could they? He couldn't talk about it without thinking of ending his own life.

He knew Trowa was in the hospital room almost all the time. Since there was usually no one else, and no other Gundam pilots, he assumed he was in an Oz facility. Even thinking of Oz brought on the painful memories of his father's last moments.

__

"Are you telling me to just sit back as Oz invades the colony?..Quatre, promise me you won't fight in those mobile suits any more. Using force won't resolve anything!" Oh, God, why was he thinking this? How could he be sure this wasn't hell?

"Father, please escape!" Like his father would've listened to him. When did his father ever really listen to him. He should've said 'I love you and I promise not to fight in mobile suits any more, just come back here, Father.' But he didn't say it.

"Quatre, what I'm doing is escaping. I am not going to put up a fight. There is no end to this fight, so I've opted to run away. If I end up dying, then so be it…"Quatre could feel tears rolling down his cheeks, as if the whole incident was really happening again. Soon he would be out of the hell he was putting himself through, with each moment that passed, his brain became more alive. Suddenly, Trowa's voice cut into his memories, breaking the darkness.

"C'mon, Quatre. You can't give up now." Quatre so badly wanted to tell Trowa that he'd be alright. When he felt Trowa's hand on his forehead, he got his chance.

"I'll be fine, Trowa. Don't worry." After that brief moment, Quatre was sucked back into his memories.

******

The Oz base was actually fairly hard to find, even for Duo and Wufei. But Wufei supposed that Oz had to hide the base, seeing as it wasn't even supposed to be on the colony in the first place. Duo decided they should start looking at the museum.

"Trowa thought the shot was fatal, but Quatre's still alive. That means not only did they have an ambulance ready, but their base is near the museum." Duo deducted as they progressed towards the museum. Wufei was actually surprised that Duo could think so clearly in this situation. He had been awfully close to Quatre, but, except for the first few days, seemed totally unfazed by him being shot. Maybe it was because he was extremely focused on finding the Oz base and blowing it sky high.

As the museum came into sight, Duo felt the guilt coming back. But the guilt was just an annoyance now. It wasn't weighing down on his mind any longer. He had done everything he could at that time.

__

You can't fix the past.. Duo thought to himself. But he was going to make sure the guilt went away forever. He was going to find that Oz base and blow it up; after he got Quatre out, of course. He stopped walking unexpectedly, and Wufei bumped into him.

"Duo?"

"Wufei. Doesn't that building seem out of place?" Duo was staring down an alleyway. There was a short but very large building that started at the end of the alley and expanded behind numerous buildings. It was tucked into a rather small space, very out-of-the-way. No one would see it unless they were looking for it.

Perfect Oz base.

Duo suddenly looked extremely excited. He pulled the backpack off his back and began pulling out some minor bombs. He handed some to Wufei, and smiled wickedly.

"We found it, Wufei."

"Now we need to find floor plans. Wouldn't want to blow up the wrong section first."

"Let's go make an entrance." Duo said as he made his way down the alley.

******

"…let him go? But Mr. Trieze—" Lady Une said, aghast.

"I want Quatre Raberba Winner to be freed, Lady Une, as soon as he is healthy again. We have truly gone too far this time. We tried to kill a young boy."

"He was consorting with the Gundam Pilots! He may even be one himself!"

"That's fine. You are to keep the Gundam pilot in solitary confinement. But you must let Quatre go. Everyone already thinks he's dead and that the rebels did it. I want you to set the story straight. He is alive, and Oz is taking care of him, although rebels did try to kill him. Those are your orders, Lady Une." Trieze ended, and the viewscreen blinked and went black. Lady Une stood by herself in the dark room. She didn't understand Trieze's orders. Quatre had planned to kill her! Did Trieze not care about her? She shivered slightly at the thought, but soon made up her mind. The Winner boy would not live long enough to wake from his coma. She exited the communications room and headed towards the Hospital wing. But first she had to visit the cell where the Gundam pilot was being held.

Trowa was getting the uneasy feeling of something bad coming. He wasn't sure what, or even when. He wasn't going to leave the hospital wing at all, but he was ordered by another Officer, and they were direct orders from Lady Une.

"We think that some rebels have broken into the base, and are in the Security room. If there are rebels, apprehend them." Those were his orders, although he knew something was up because he was the only officer who had been sent. He pulled out his gun and held it as he ran towards the security room---just in case there were rebels, and they happened to not be Duo and Wufei.

Five minutes later he burst into the security room to find it totally dark and empty. He moved in cautiously.

"Oh, good, it's only you." Trowa turned around and saw Duo, dressed in his usual black outfit, standing in the corner, and Wufei standing next to him. 

"What are you guys doing? The entire Oz base knows you're here!"

"Really? Then why are you the only one here?" Wufei asked darkly.

"You might want to go back to Quatre now. We're planning to blow the base up, you'll need to be ready to move him when we come. As soon as we're a safe distance from the Hospital Wing, we're blowing it up." Duo said. But Trowa was still thinking about what Wufei had said.

"Oh God…" He said after a while. "They're going to kill Quatre!" Trowa didn't wait for Duo or Wufei to respond. He ran quickly back to Quatre's hospital room to find it…just as he had left it.

According to reports from various officers, her plan was working well. Trowa seemed to be confused, so he wouldn't catch on soon.

Lady Une opened the door to Heero's cell. Heero was leaning against the wall.

"Come to kill me, I suppose?" Lady Une pulled out her gun and leveled it at his head.

"Yes, I have." She replied bluntly. Heero stood up and walked towards her.

"Go ahead. What are you waiting for?"

"Nothing in particular." Lady Une stated. She smiled, and pulled the trigger.

That's when the first explosion happened. It knocked both Heero and Lady Une off balance, sending Lady Une to the floor, and Heero careening into a wall. The bullet missed Heero's head, and caught him in the shoulder instead.

Heero didn't hesitate. As soon as he got his balance back, he bolted for the door.

"Heero! C'mon!" Duo yelled as he ran past. All the officers who had been guarding his cell were either dead, dying, or unconscious. He followed after Duo.

"Where are we going?"

"To get Quatre!"

As soon as Lady Une heard those words, she knew she had to get to Quatre first. And since she knew the Oz base better then any of those stupid Gundam pilots, she knew she wouldn't have a problem. She got up and ran down the hall leading back towards the Communication's room; in the opposite direction of Duo, Wufei, and Heero. 

******

__

"Quatre, father fought very hard. He wasn't running away at all. He put up a brave fight, don't you think so?..You're a kind person, Quatre, and father was kind too. But what did father do to deserve to be killed?.." _Eraya had died because of him. Even worse, she had lied to him and herself. He wasn't a kind person, because of his stupidity, she was dead. She died saving him, and he could do nothing in return. And now, he was putting his friends through this. He wanted to die, but he knew he couldn't. He wasn't supposed to die a meaningless death, something told him this wasn't the way it was supposed to be._

"No…" He murmured softly.

With that word, his darkness, his hell, was broken. He could feel the pain from the wound…or was that a pain in his heart?

Trowa rushed over to Quatre's bed, almost excitedly; more in anticipation.

"Quatre?," he could've sworn Quatre had said the word 'no', "Can you hear me?"

"Trowa?" Quatre muttered. He had responded, but his eyes still weren't open. Trowa noticed that Quatre had been crying.

He thought maybe he was blind. He couldn't see anything, but he could clearly hear Trowa, he could even respond to him. _Maybe,_ he thought to himself, _maybe I don't want to face him._

When he tried again, his eyes opened.

It took him a moment to focus, but when he did, he clearly saw Trowa sitting less then three feet away. Quatre slid himself slowly into a sitting position, too choked with joy to speak. He smiled warmly as his eyes filled with tears.

"Oh, God, Trowa…I'm so sorry.." Quatre said as the tears ran down his cheeks in incessant streams.

Trowa was at a complete loss for words. He was sorry? About what? If anyone should be apologizing, it was him. Quatre was smiling happily at him, but obviously he was thinking of confessing something.

Trowa found himself smiling.

"There's nothing for you to be sorry about, Quatre."

"Yes there is. This is more my fault then you can know." Trowa was surprised, but he never looked away from Quatre. If Quatre wanted to talk, then he would listen to him. But Quatre was silent for a lone time, and he still would not make eye contact with Trowa.

He wasn't sure if he could do this. There was an empty place inside of him where warm memories of his father should be. He shivered slightly and closed his eyes, getting ready to finally tell Trowa why he did what he did.

"Trowa, I..—" He opened his eyes slowly, as Trowa wrapped his arms around him, hugging him warmly. The cold and darkness that was inside him disappeared as Quatre realized what I big mistake his suicide attempt was.

"Quatre, if it hurts that much, maybe now isn't the time to talk about it." Trowa whispered in his ear. Quatre was too choked to respond, so instead he rested his head on Trowa's shoulder and returned the hug. He let his tears fall silently onto Trowa's Oz uniform, soaking the shoulder he was leaning on.

And for the first time in a long while, Quatre felt loved. The first explosion rippled through the building, but Quatre and Trowa did not release eachother.

"I wish I could take your advice, Trowa. But what I have to say is important." Quatre said when he found his voice again. "I don't want you blaming yourself for something that isn't your fault." Trowa was about to respond, but Quatre cut him off.

"I'm going to tell you something, Trowa. Something I'm sure you already know. My father, and my sister Eraya are dead. Oz blames their deaths on rebels, while the rebels blame the deaths on Oz. But they aren't blaming the right person, Trowa. It wasn't Oz, or the rebels, or the colonists." Trowa was waiting to hear Lady Une's name. "It was me, Trowa. I killed them."

Trowa was shocked, and remained silent as he searched for the words the express his severe disbelief.

"It wasn't you, Quatre! It was Lady Une! She manipulated the colonists and made them believe your father was an enemy!" Trowa said, still a little dazed about Quatre's confession. He could feel Quatre sobbing on his shoulder. He tried to release him so he could look at him, and so Quatre could see the concern in his eyes. But Quatre hugged Trowa closer, obviously not wanting Trowa to let him go just yet.

"It was me, Trowa. Maybe if I had listened to my father and not taken the Gundam. Maybe if I hadn't deceived my sister into believing I was so kind, so considerate. Everything I did of didn't do in the past, in every battle I fought, led to my enemies becoming their enemies." His faltering tone broke into a series of sobs as he thought about his father.

"All I was trying to do was protect them from the sorrows of war. That's why I took Sandrock, to protect my family. Instead it ended up killing them. I haven't talked with any of my other sisters since the incident. I don't think anything I can say to them would make their pain go away."

"Quatre, if you didn't think Lady Une was to blame, why did you plan to kill her?" Trowa asked, not knowing what to say to Quatre to comfort him.

"It was part of my suicide plan." Quatre stated bluntly. He figured there was no point in avoiding it any longer. "You can't imagine the pain I felt every night, every day, walking through the house. Everywhere I looked, I kept seeing my father, and I kept remembering all the mean things we said to eachother. How could I have wanted to live with that? I didn't. But I didn't want to take my own life, I couldn't because I knew I shouldn't. I couldn't stop feeling the pain, though.

So I decided to take down the one person who was deceiving the colonies. And make sure that I went down with her. That would give my life some meaning. I didn't mean to get you all involved, but I was inconsiderate. I felt like there was no one I could talk to, that no one needed me because I would only cause them more pain.

I knew, Trowa, I knew you would try to stop me. I knew you would try to get Lady Une not to come. Please, Trowa, you have to forgive me. I used your concern for me to make my plan work. A few days before the peace talks were to take place, I found one of the devices that Oz was using to listen to my plan. And I knew then that everything had worked.

But lying in a coma, putting myself through hell, I knew I had done the wrong thing, and that I had committed the greatest crime of all. I betrayed my friendship. Not only to you, but to all the other Gundam pilots. I used your friendship for me, I placed you all in the room where I knew you would be best suited not to help me. I'm so sorry, Trowa, and if you don't forgive me, I'll understand."

Trowa couldn't believe the blasphemy Quatre was saying. Trowa released Quatre from the hug, and Quatre did the same. For the first time in almost three weeks, they made eye contact.

"Of course I forgive you, Quatre. But you have to realize it wasn't your fault. I'll always be here for you, whenever you need to talk about anything. Just promise me you won't do this again." Quatre nodded in agreement.

"Trowa…you're shedding tears, for me?" Quatre asked in disbelief. Trowa wiped his cheeks as if he didn't know he was crying.

"I'm your friend, Quatre. While you were in the coma, I couldn't stop worrying about you." Trowa got up from the bed and walked to the foot of the bed. "I'm glad to see you're alright, Quatre. I really am." Trowa looked back at Quatre and saw something different about him. Was it the way his eyes seemed to shine with hope, or was it the way he smiled; not that sad smile that he had done before, this one seemed to be combined of happiness and trust.

Quatre was going to be alright, Trowa was sure of it.

******

"Go ahead, Wufei! Detonate the next set of bombs!" Duo yelled behind him. They were moving too slow, too many Oz officers had gathered in the hallways.

"It's too close to the hospital wing, it's too big an explosion!"

"We're behind, we need a distraction, Trowa's with Quatre, it'll be fine, now detonate the damned thing!" Duo yelled as he pulled out his rifle, shot an officer in his way, and ducked into an open door for cover, with Heero and Wufei following.

"Duo's right, we won't make it before Lady Une. She went around a different way. She obviously knows a quicker way to get to Quatre. She's going to kill him if we don't stop her. She may even kill Trowa too." Heero stated factually.

"Throw the damned switch, Wufei!" Duo yelled as he fired at a few more soldiers.

Wufei pressed the detonation. 

Lady Une was past the point of the explosion, but not far enough. She was thrown forward, and went sliding across the tile floor. The Gundams were getting desperate now. They were looking for distractions, but none were coming.

She climbed to her feet and straightened her uniform, smiling. There was no way the Gundams could save Quatre in time.

Victory was hers.

Trowa was thrown against the wall by the explosion. All his weight slammed into the wall, throwing him off balance. Quatre was thrown from the hospital bed, but stopped himself before he slid into the wall. Trowa waited a few moments before picking himself up.

"Something's wrong. Duo wasn't supposed to set off that bomb until we were out of here." Trowa said coolly as he helped Quatre to his feet. Quatre had an arm wrapped around his bare mid-drift. Trowa noticed for the first time that Quatre was still wearing his white tuxedo pants, which had dried blood splattered on them. A pang of guilt shot through Trowa, but he quickly reminded himself that everything was going to be fine, they would get Quatre out of there, and the situation would return to normal. "Your wound still hurts that much?" Trowa asked as he helped Quatre into a sitting position on the bed.

"Yeah, it still is pretty painful." He wasn't going to tell Trowa that he wasn't sure if it was the hollowness he felt inside, or his wound. He felt better now that he had confessed to Trowa. But something about the situation was still off. He couldn't place it, and the emptiness inside him didn't help him focus. He realized then that it didn't matter who he blamed, or how many times he confessed, the emptiness would never go away.

He would have to learn to live with it.

"I'll go find Duo and ask him what that was all about. Stay here, and don't move. You'll have to save up your strength so we can get you out of here easier." Quatre nodded, and looked up at Trowa as he walked towards the door. 

"Be careful. Duo probably didn't set off that bomb by accident." Quatre said to Trowa as he exited the room.

Trowa didn't feel safe leaving Quatre alone, but he had to find out if Duo had changed the plan. He considered going back and giving Quatre his gun, just in case, but he decided against that idea. As much as he forgave Quatre, he still had doubt about him no trying suicide again. Trowa knew that Quatre would always feel responsible for the death of his father; that was the kind of person Quatre was. Trowa also knew that the pain of having someone close to you become a casualty of war could be greater than any physical pain endured. He made his way swiftly down the hallway, heading towards the sound of gunfire.

Lady Une watched Trowa's retreating figure through the dust that filled the air. He only looked back once, and obviously didn't see her because he kept walking away from the hospital room. She had to struggle to keep from laughing. This was turning out perfect. Now all that was left was to get the Winner boy out of the way. She walked towards the hospital room, took her gun out of it's holster, and opened the door to the room, letting it swing open.

She was shocked to see Quatre standing up next to the bed, obviously alarmed to see Lady Une in the doorway. She wondered suddenly if she would be able to shoot the defenseless boy.

As soon as Quatre heard the handle on the door click open, he stood up from the bed. It was too soon for Trowa to be back, and Quatre had the sinking feeling that whoever it was wasn't coming to see how he was feeling. When the door swung open, he saw Lady Une. She looked surprised to see him awake and standing, but she soon got over her shock. She entered the room, closing and locking the door behind her. She turned back to Quatre, and moved towards him until she was little less than three feet away from him, the gun only about a foot from his face. If she pulled the trigger, his brains would splatter against the wall behind him. Quatre closed his eyes and swallowed hard.

__

God help me, he thought, _I don't want to die this way…_ He opened his eyes again to see the barrel of the gun still pointed at his face, and Lady Une standing behind the gun, smiling wickedly.

"How does it feel knowing you're going to die?" She asked coldly, clearly referring to Quatre's plan to kill her. "You're lucky that Mr. Trieze is much nicer to rebels then I. If it had been up to me, I would've left you to die at the museum that night."  
"Why didn't you? If you were just going to kill me anyway, why revive me?" Quatre asked unsteadily. He had just barely gotten over the coma, and now he was going to die before he could regain everyone's trust. He was never going to fix his mistakes, he was never going to tell Trowa or any of the other Gundam pilots how much their friendship meant to him; he was going to die before any of them would know how sorry he was for putting them through this. Their last memory of him would be betrayal. He struggled to hold back his tears of regret and sorrow.

__

I'm so sorry, my dear friends.. He thought to himself.

"Mr. Trieze ordered me to let you go. But I will not. You were planning to take my life, and I was planning to take yours with or without mine. Mr. Trieze was the only thing that stopped me from killing you that night." She paused and smirked. "But Mr. Trieze isn't here to save you this time."

******

The dust from the explosion filled the air like a fog. Duo was sure that there were no more Oz soldiers in his way, and he quickly pulled ahead of Wufei and Heero as he made his way towards Quatre's hospital room.

"Hang in there, Quatre. I'm coming." Duo whispered as he turned the corner leading into the hospital wing.

Trowa could hear heavy footsteps up ahead, and he guessed it could only be Duo.

"Duo! What's going on?" Trowa yelled down the hallway as he slowed his speed and waited for Duo. Soon the black-clad boy came into vision, although the dust and debris made it hard for Trowa to be sure it was Duo.

He thought he had heard Trowa call his name. But why would Trowa leave Quatre when he knew Quatre was in danger? Duo skidded to a halt when he saw an Oz uniform up ahead.

"Damn!" He muttered to himself as he realized it was Trowa up ahead. "Trowa!, What the hell are you doing out here?! You're supposed to be waiting for us with Quatre!" Duo yelled as he came face-to-face with Trowa. Trowa's expression didn't change.

"I thought maybe something might be wrong. I thought that explosion," he pointed down the hallway towards the hospital room, "was supposed to be last." Duo cursed his stupidity. He completely forgot that he had told Trowa that.

"Quatre's as good as dead now." He muttered aloud. Trowa looked at Duo in alarm. "I told Wufei to set off those next because Lady Une was heading towards Quatre from that direction! We needed a distraction." Duo looked around, and ferociously kicked a chunk of plaster on the ground. "God-damnit! If that blast didn't stop Lady Une, then Quatre's dead!" Duo turned back around. "Trowa?" He looked around, and when he realized Trowa had gone after Lady Une, he started off after him.

"Duo! Wait!" Wufei shouted as he saw Duo take off down the hallway.

"There's a problem." Heero said as he walked up next to Wufei.

"That was Trowa, then?"

"Yeah. We're probably too late."

"Let's find out." Wufei said as he headed after Duo.

******

"If you want to live you will answer my question! What is your relation to the Gundams? Are you one of them?" Lady Une asked again.

"I……don't know what you're talking about." Quatre whispered. She'd been asking him the same question over, and every time he had given her the same answer.

"You really don't want to live?" A new question, finally.

"I value life more then anything! But I still don't know what you're talking about!" Quatre yelled in mock frustration. Lady Une smirked.

"You put up quite an act, but you aren't fooling me one bit." A third explosion rippled through, but it was too far away to disturb the scene. "Good-bye, Quatre Raberba Winner."

Trowa reached Quatre's hospital room in time to hear Lady Une say, "Good-bye, Quatre Raberba Winner." Without a moments hesitation, Trowa pulled out his gun and kicked the door open.

As the door swung open behind her, much to her surprise, she pulled the trigger. Quatre stumbled backwards and slid to the ground, clutching the right side of his head.  
"Quatre! NO!" Trowa yelled. But as he looked, he saw the bullet lodged in the wall. Lady Une had missed her target, barely.

Lady Une spun around to face Trowa, gun in hand.

"Officer Trowa Barton. I order you to put that gun down right now."

"I will not take orders from you, Lady Une, if you do not take orders from Trieze." Trowa replied.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Lady Une spat.

"Trieze would never tell you to kill a defenseless boy like Quatre. Especially not an injured defenseless boy like Quatre."

"I will no tolerate your insubordinate attitude!" Lady Une erupted.

Before Trowa could respond or react, Lady Une fired her gun. Quatre jerked his head up, and saw Trowa fall to the ground.

"Trowa?!" He scrambled to his feet and ran over to Trowa, pushing Lady Une out of the way. "TROWA!" He stood helplessly staring at Trowa, who was lying in a puddle of blood on the floor. Quatre slumped to his knees next to Trowa, landing right in the blood. He began sobbing as he hugged Trowa's limp body. He closed his eyes and let his tears mix with the blood on his face and the floor.

"Trowa, I'm sorry. Please, don't die, Trowa. I won't be able to live if you die now…" Quatre whispered. He opened his eyes again, and noticed where the blood was coming from. _His shoulder?.._ Quatre thought, and he slowly realized what happened. Trowa must've hit his head on the floor, which knocked him unconscious. The bullet had hit him in the shoulder, which meant he would survive.

But if Quatre knew he was going to live, why couldn't he stop crying? He hugged Trowa closer, not only to fool Lady Une, but because he felt that if he let go, he'd be betraying their priceless friendship.

"Please, Trowa, you'll be alright. We'll both get out of here alright…" Quatre sobbed. He couldn't believe that Trowa had been shot defending him. _He risked his life for me, after I violated our friendship. He would've died for me, if it had come down to that._ This thought made Quatre feel rotten for using Trowa's friendship.

"I'm sorry, Trowa. I'm sorry I'm so weak; that there was nothing I could do to help you. Next time I'll think more like you."

Quatre's eyes grew wide as he felt the cold barrel of Lady Une's gun placed at the base of his neck. He had totally forgotten about her in his fear of Trowa dying.

"There won't be a next time." Lady Une said triumphantly.

Quatre closed his eyes tight, waiting for the final shot to be fired.

A single, deadly shot was fired. A moment passed, and the gun slipped from the back of Quatre's neck, clattering to the ground. Quatre opened his eyes and looked up.

"Duo!" He said as he saw the boy in the doorway. He turned around to see Lady Une, holding onto the bed for support, an arm wrapped around her chest.

"Hey, Quatre, I'm glad to see you're awake." He paused as he noticed Quatre's head wound. "Are you alright?" He added, a little more concern in his voice.

"I'll be alright." Quatre said as he got up and struggled to pick up Trowa. He wasn't going to tell Duo about the massive pain in his head, he wanted Duo to take care of Trowa first.

"Here, I'll get him." Duo said as he picked Trowa up from the ground. "What happened?"

"He was shot, trying to save me." Quatre said quietly. He turned to Lady Une and went to help her, but Duo grabbed his shoulder. 

"Not this time, Quatre. Leave her." Duo said coldly. Quatre hesitated for a moment, and then turned away.

Wufei and Heero came running into the doorway, and almost ran into Duo, who was about to leave.

"Oh, hey guys! You missed all the action." Duo said rather cheerfully. Wufei looked inside the hospital room to see Quatre, his white pants soaked with blood, helping Lady Une onto the bed. Duo turned around and sighed.

"Quatre! C'mon, this place is about to explode." Quatre gently placed Lady Une, who was almost unconscious, onto the bed.

"Okay, Duo. Let's go." He said softly as he turned away from the bed. He stumbled, and leaned on the wall for support. His head wound must've been worse then he first thought. He was having trouble focusing, and nausea was gripping his stomach. "Go on. I'll be okay, you have to get Trowa out of here." He breathed as he pressed his back against the wall and closed his eyes, taking a few deep breaths.

"Come on, Quatre." Heero said as he entered the room. "We aren't leaving you here." He walked over to Quatre and wrapped an arm behind him, supporting most of his weight. Quatre smiled meekly.

"Thank you, Heero." He whispered weakly.

"How much time do we have, Wufei?" Duo asked. Wufei pulled out a watch and looked at it.

"Fifteen minutes."

"Let's go!" Duo said as he made his way out the door, followed by Wufei, Heero, and Quatre.

It was a lot harder finding their way out of the facility. Debris was everywhere, and most of the time it was blocking the way completely. Duo was struggling with Trowa, who was still completely unconscious.

"Okay, that's it." Duo muttered as he placed Trowa on the ground. "Does anybody have some cold water?"

"What?"

"Trowa's the only one who knows how to get out of here quickly. Wufei, how much time do we have now?"

"Five minutes."

"Five minutes?!" Duo said, exasperated.

"Why don't you just blow out the wall?" Heero asked calmly. Duo leaned against the closest wall.

"Do you know where this leads? Sure, it could lead outside. Or, it could lead further into the building. I don't think we can afford to take that risk." He motioned towards Trowa and Quatre, who were both unconscious for the moment.

"Maybe one of these rooms will have a floor plan…" Wufei thought aloud as he opened the door to one of the rooms and peered inside. "A computer! Perfect." Wufei said a moment later. He entered the room and sat down at the computer.

"You got anything, Wufei?"

"Not yet." Wufei said as he typed frantically at the keyboard. "Wait..got it." Duo walked into he room.

"Alright, if we keep heading straight," he said as he ran his finger on the computer screen, following the floor plan, "We can blow that wall out. Otherwise, we'll never make it out in time. Okay, let's move."

"Two minutes left."

"I know, I know." Duo said warily as he picked Trowa up again.

They continued to make their way slowly down the hall.

******

__

I should've listened to Mr. Trieze… Lady Une thought to herself as she laid on the bed, staring at the ceiling. She was in immense pain, and was still in a state of disbelief. Not only about being shot, but about the fact that Quatre had tried to help her. _After I tried to kill him; after I shot him and his friend, he helped me…_ she thought remorsefully. _…Trieze was right, we did go too far. _She winced as a new wave of pain consumed her. She squeezed her eyes shut, and was surprised to feel tears rolling down her cheeks. _I should've listened…_

He had been drifting in and out of consciousness for the past ten minutes, but still could not decide which was worse. The pain in his head was equivalent either way, but when he was unconscious, he kept having a reoccurring vision of being back in the hospital room, watching Lady Une die, but being unable to help her. With the reoccurring vision came the reoccurring realization that another person died because he was selfish.

Then he would wake up, and see their predicament. Duo was cursing every other word, Wufei seemed a bit annoyed by the entire situation, and Heero was his usual cool-but-determined self. No matter how hard Quatre tried, he couldn't help but feel immoral. He had deceived them all, but they still went through all the trouble to rescue him. He couldn't believe that he had thought they wouldn't miss him if he died.

But right at that particular moment, he was nothing but a burden to his friends, who were trying so desperately to escape before the explosion.

__

No..no, that's not true. Quatre convinced himself. It couldn't be true, because if he was a burden, an annoyance, then they would've left him back in the hospital room. _The hospital room…_ Quatre thought, and had a sickeningly vivid picture of Lady Une lying in the blood soaked sheets, dying.

"We…have to go back." He whispered out loud. Heero looked at him, but Wufei and Duo kept walking.

"No we don't, Quatre. Forget about her, she'll never survive."

"How many…people have said that…about you, Heero, and yet you manage to rise above all odds….we have to help her."

"She got what she deserved." Heero said simply. Up ahead, Duo put Trowa down, and pulled his bookbag off, taking out some of the minor bombs he had packed.

"Stay there, guys. This wall'll be out of our way in a minute." Duo said. He placed the bombs at various spots on the wall, then picked up Trowa and ducked behind some debris for cover.

An explosion sounded, and when most the dust cleared from the air, they were met with the light of a beautiful morning.

"Thirty-five seconds." Wufei said as he quickly made his way outside, followed closely by Duo, carrying Trowa; and Heero and Quatre.

"Five…four…"

"Yeah, yeah. We know how to count, Wufei!" Duo yelled ahead of him. They had only made it about six yards before the building exploded behind them. They dove to the ground, covering their heads to block the falling glass.

******

He was lying in the darkness of his mind again, and couldn't help but wonder if the entire rescue had just been a dream. A dream, to relieve his mind of guilt before he died.

But it hadn't been a dream. He knew it hadn't because he kept having that horrible vision of Lady Une. For some reason, the vision wasn't bringing as much guilt as he had thought it would. In fact, he was sure that somehow she had survived that fatal shot, and the explosion.

__

After all, I survived, didn't I? He thought. He moaned as he opened his eyes, the pain in his head becoming evident once more. He reached a hand up to his head, and found his wound wrapped in gauze.

He looked around slowly, as his head was throbbing, and sighed happily as he realized he was in his room. The window had been opened and sunlight was streaming in, hitting the objects in his room and casting weird shadows on the wall. He made an effort to get out of bed, but the pain in his head was numbing and it forced him to keep his head on the pillow. He smiled as he closed his eyes, thanking God that the entire incident was over. He knew for sure he would never try suicide again, he had realized what a big mistake it was. But he also knew it would take months to gain back the trust of the other pilots. _But it'll be worth it,_ he thought happily. _They're the only friends I've got, I can't afford to lose them. _He laid in the glorious silence of his room for another five minutes before the door opened and Duo walked in. Quatre struggled into a sitting position as Duo pulled up a chair next to his bed and sat down.

"Hey, Quatre! How're you feeling?" He said cheerfully as he smiled at Quatre, who smiled back.

"I'm feeling a lot better, Duo. Thanks a lot." He replied. Duo sighed and yawned.

"That's great. We had to take you to a hospital after we got out of the Oz base. Ends up your head wound was a lot worse then anyone expected, although they wouldn't tell us exactly what was so bad. They had to operate, the bullet scraped your skull, nothing too big, didn't crack it or anything I don't think. They just had to make sure, then they had to stitch it up. We finally convinced them it'd be better if you came home and rested. You've been unconscious for about a day. Not too bad if I do say so myself. You're all over the news, everyone thought you were dead, and then you suddenly show up in the hospital. Of course, we didn't tell the media anything." Duo said, and yawned again. 

"How long have you been up, Duo?" Quatre asked, noticing that Duo kept yawning. 

"I've been in and out of sleep ever since you got home. I couldn't help but worry, ya know?" Duo said, and then grinned.

"Maybe you should go sleep now, then. I'm alright, don't worry about me. The whole situation's done, don't let it worry you anymore." Quatre said. As Duo made to leave, Quatre suddenly remembered something.

"Duo?"

"Yeah?" Duo turned back around to face Quatre, who was leaning on his elbow.

"How's Trowa?"

"I think I'll let him tell you himself." Duo smirked as he opened the door and stepped out. Quatre put his head back on the pillow.

"Hey, guess who's awake!!" Duo said as he entered the living room. Heero, who was watching the news looked uninterested while Wufei made his well-thought-out move on the chess board. Trowa, who was contending well against Wufei, got up and turned to face Duo. "He wants to see you, Trowa." Duo said as he sat in Trowa's seat. "Don't worry, I'll take over here. Keep the game interesting, Wufei." He added as he turned away from Trowa.

Trowa climbed up the staircase and towards Quatre's room. He couldn't help but feel relieved; for a while he thought Quatre had slipped into another coma. After all, he had just barely gotten over the first one. The doctors said he would need rest after the operation so his body could regenerate it's energy, and Trowa was supposed to be in bed as well. But his right arm was in a sling, and he wasn't supposed to use it until the muscles healed, so he figured lying in bed would do nothing to help repair the muscle.

He opened the door to Quatre's room in time to see the young boy trying to get out of bed, obviously fighting against unconsciousness.

"You should stay in bed." Trowa said in his usual soft but concerned tone. He closed the door behind himself as he entered the room. Quatre sighed heavily as he rested against the backboard of the bed again.

"Trowa! How are you?" Quatre asked as he smiled at his friend, who took a seat in the chair next to his bed.

"Admittedly, I've been better." He replied truthfully. "How are you?" He asked. Quatre looked longingly towards the window.

"I'd be doing a lot better if I could get over to the window.." Quatre said sheepishly. Trowa couldn't help but laugh. "How long do you have to wear the sling?" He added and looked back at Trowa with a concerned but warm expression.

"About a week or two." Trowa answered, and then got up from the chair, making his way to the other side of Quatre's bed. "You really want to go out on the balcony?" He asked as he rounded the other side of the bed. Quatre smiled up at him, and then looked away, slightly embarrassed.

"Yeah, I do. I know it sounds stupid, but I haven't been outside in such a long time." He said humbly.

"It's not stupid, Quatre. I don't blame you for wanting to go outside, it's a beautiful day." Trowa said, comforting his friend. He then helped Quatre off the bed, and out onto the balcony.

Trowa was right, it was a splendid day outside. The sun was shining and there wasn't a cloud for miles. Quatre leaned against the rail on the balcony and smiled, grateful to still be alive.

******

Trieze stood outside of the operating room, restless, worried, and annoyed. He couldn't figure out why she had disobeyed him. *I'm sure she's learned her lesson.* He thought. He then turned to Lieutenant Talcon, who had been standing with him for the operation so far.

"You will be commended, Lieutenant Talcon, for bringing her out alive."

"But Mr. Trieze, she may—" Trieze held up a hand, and Lieutenant Talcon fell silent.

"—she is alive, Lieutenant. She wouldn't leave me." He said simply, and turned back to the O.R. doors. A six-hour or more operation. Trieze sighed, rubbed his eyes, and then took a seat. He'd been there for three hours so far; he had canceled all of his speeches, all of his meetings. *She needs to know I care. She needs my support.* He thought stoically. *Don't leave me, Lady.*

******

"Quatre, c'mon, we're gonna be late." Duo said as he walked up next to him. It was a few weeks after the Oz base incident, and everything had returned to basically normal.

"I'm almost done, Duo." Quatre said quietly. He then knelt down next to the grave he had been standing at, placing a bouquet of flowers in between his father's grave and his sister's grave. It was a bright, summer day, with barely any breeze. *This looks just like a scene from a movie..* Duo thought as he watched Quatre place the flowers, and then stand back up.

"Trowa wants you to be on time for his show." Duo reminded Quatre. Quatre bowed his head, paying one final respect to the graves, and then turned to face Duo.

"I know. We can still make it. But do you think it's smart that he's back to doing acrobatics? His arm only healed a few days ago."

"No, I don't think it's smart. And I don't think it's smart that you're out of bed. You're not completely healed yet, if you haven't noticed." Duo said, trying to sound like he had some authority. Quatre looked away for a moment, a look of guilt crossing his face. 

"I know, Duo. But I don't feel like I'm doing anything useful lying in bed all the time." 

"You're not being useful now." Duo joked, and then smiled. "C'mon, let's go. I want to see what's so great about this show." Duo said as he began walking, followed by Quatre.

"This is the same circus his sister's in, isn't it?" Quatre asked after they exited the graveyard.

"Yeah, they're touring all the colonies, so Trowa decided to join up with them when they came here." Duo said. The circus tent soon came into view, and they could see the crowd of people waiting in line as they walked across the field. "Geeze, good thing we don't have to wait on that line.." Duo said as Quatre and him rounded the back of the tent and entered through the open flap. Cathrine spotted them almost right away.

"You're right on time. Go take a seat, Trowa's getting ready to walk the tight rope." She said as she quickly escorted them to seats in the front row. Her voice wasn't very friendly towards them, but Quatre couldn't blame her. She disliked war with a passion, and in her opinion it was the Gundam pilot's fault that Trowa had gone back to fighting. As soon as she was sure they were seated in a place Trowa would notice, she made for the back of the tent again.

Duo leaned back in his seat, and put his feet up on the rail. "Let's see how he does." He said.

"He'll do wonderfully, I know he will." Quatre said as his eyes followed the spotlight up to the tight rope. He smiled and laughed as he saw Trowa in his clown costume.

"Trowa as a clown…now who would've guessed that much. I still think that's strange." Duo said.

"Daddy! Look!! A clown!!" Quatre turned around as he heard the excited voice of a five-year-old boy. He couldn't help but stare at the boy and his father, the way they got along so well, how happy that boy's childhood must be, even in the time of war they were living in. The boy was sitting on his father's lap, pointing up at Trowa, and smiling excitedly. The father met Quatre's gaze for a second, and then smiled warmly.

"Still come to the circus at your age?" The man said to Quatre. Quatre smiled.

"Can't keep myself away. It's always so exciting to watch." Quatre replied. The man nodded in agreement, and then turned his attention back to his son. Quatre turned back around, and blinked away some tears in his eyes.

"You can't live in the past, Quatre. You still have your future ahead of you." Duo said.

"I know, Duo. You're right." Quatre said. *But you can never understand the value of your life if you don't stop to look back at it every once in a while..* He thought, and watched as Trowa began to make his way on the tight rope. 

__

The EndeyHeyHHey 


End file.
